Friday, October 26, 2007

Life is Chaos & The World's Most Expensive Dogs

I've been neglectful in posting this last couple of weeks as my life has descended into total chaos. I did post a very long and, some who saw it said, amusing post earlier this week about my great husband and his job but he got nervous about it and I had to take it down. I'm sure you would have loved it had you been permitted to see it. You see it 's not just H&G that's censoring us but our own family members!!!!!. We can't get a break.

Anyway, this week I am doing some work on my house. They say the shoemakers children have no shoes - well, the designers house is always a total mess and is never ever finished. I cringe every time I find out someone is coming over. Most of my distressed has been caused by the family pets.

I never thought I would become a dog person. I thought dog people were weird and a bit psycho. I've always had dogs and cats but they we're just pets to me. They laid around, ate, took up space and we're basically a pain in the a$$ to arrange care for when I went out of town. Then two years ago, on a whim, I bought my husband a miniature dachshund. Her name is Peanut and I now refer to her as my husbands clandestine "doggie luuvvvver". Not in a literal sense of course - that would be weird - but the two are inseparable.

After we got Peanut we couldn't bear for her to be lonely so we got her a little friend - another mini-dachshund named Marty. They are both adorable little things only about 8 pounds each. We call them cat-dogs because they have a lot of cat-like qualities. They climb on things and sleep on top of the sofa back or around your neck and of course have to sleep in bed with us. (too much information ??)

So now we are officially "those people" who are crazy about their dogs and talk about them like they are children. No, I don't not dress them up in fancy outfits ( I tried but they won't keep them on ) I don't carry them around in a Louis Vuitton dog purse ( I tried that to but they barked constantly and tried to chew their way out), and I definitely don't take them to work with me ( I work at home now so they are with me 24 -7) .

Now here comes the expensive part. Just like bad little children those dam little dogs refuse to commit to housebreaking. They do not like the inconvenience of going outside to do their business but instead prefer the soft and luxurious carpeted areas of our home. They do not however, seem to enjoy dropping their load on the tile floors. Therefore, in order to rid my house of it's unpleasant dog poop aroma that even the strongest Glade candle could not quench, I am forced to go to great expense to put in wood floors throughout the house. I am hoping against hope that they will finally get the message and resolve to use the dog door. We did the downstairs this week and had to move everything into the entry and kitchen which are tiled. Talk about a disaster - I have way too much stuff. It looks like a furniture store after a bad San Francisco earthquake in here.

OMG look at the dust on top of those bookcases - for shame!!!!

All of this for a couple of over pampered dogs!!!!

In the midst of this flooring project I was getting ready to do a Home Decorating & Remodeling Show here in Vegas. I was hired to do some easy DIY window treatments for display and to give three seminars at the show. My display space was supposed to be 10' x 8' of floor space including three walls. When I got to the show on Wednesday to set up they had given me a 20' x 20' island space which meant I had to cover 3x's the space I had been told. So I have spent the last 3 days killing myself making new samples and setting up this booth. Not my idea of a good time!!! For anyone interested I will post some pictures of my samples in the next couple of days.

So today after working 12 hours at the Home Show I came home to my house which is in complete disarray. There is not an empty surface to be found or a chair in the right place to sit in. The home show ends on Sunday and then I can come home and try to put my place back together.

And by the way, one of the little rat bastards has already left me a nice fresh gift on my new wood floor!!!!!!


Unknown said...

Hi Jackie
I can totally relate to your expensive little pets. My little girl just christened my new white wool carpet in my Master bedroom. I know, I should have known better. It is the only room in the house that I indulged in carpet. Everywhere else is wood with persian carpets, which I find to hide all the accidents incredibly well. I can also relate to your chaos, being in the midst of a move and having workmen still all around me, with dust and debris left behind everyday. Sigh...Your Peanut and Marty are adorable!!

Anonymous said...

Hilarious post! May I suggest you do some crate training? These are dogs after all--they should be trainable no matter how cute or small they are.

Your pics made my day! I can totally relate to the messy house. It's taken me about 4 weeks to paint the LR of my 1920s apt. My place looks like a landfill right now. Ah, but the walls are a beautiful shade of Devine Blue.

Jackie, I'm wondering, would you ever be interested in playing "stump the designer" with your loyal readers? We could send you a window related dilemma and you could respond with an answer from your book (or otherwise).

This way you wouldn't have to always wrack your brain with a new idea for a post and could promote your book as well. You could do "stump the designer" friday (or monday, or whatever day you like). How about it?

some of us read your hubby post. :)
i was wondering if you'd get int trouble for that!

Linda Merrill said...

Peanut and Marty just miss you! And, true to dachshund form (I grew up with 2 - Wiggy and Tiny) they will leave you with no doubt of their pique at being left!

Unknown said...

Patricia - White carpet? You are a brave woman! I hope you will post pictures of your new pad when it's done. I can't wait to see it.

Unknown said...

We tried crate training when they were puppies but I woosed out when they cried. It's my own fault. Thanks for your suggestions, If you have any questions about design just email me and I'll be happy to answer them.

Anonymous said...

The things we do our "furbabies" , huh? (sigh) Your home is lovely even in disarray, Jackie! You have great taste & style. BTW, I got my new WT's up & twisted & scrunched the rod pocket & lightly stuffed with tissue paper to make a floppy turned down valance for my new silk gold/red window treatments for the Dining room. I used clippy rings but the valance being twisty & ruffled kinda hides the rings. I used short rods since the rods I bought from my decorator friend long time ago that my blue ones were hung on were longer drapes so had to move these down a tad & the LR is right across the foyer in an open floor plan front area. That was long.....sorry! :) Bonnie

Unknown said...

Hi Bonnie,
Send me a pic of your dining room treatments I'd love to see them!

Anonymous said...

Just emailed you the pics, Jackie!
Nice to meet another WT fan like me........I love window treatments!

katiedid said...

I feel your pain! We just moved out furniture and all the other remodeling crap out of our living room (where it had been for over a year) last weekend. It is really a state of limbo til you get things set to rights again. The floors lok great! It will be worth it. :)

cotedetexas said...

Funny, funny. I'm sending this to my friend, who has 2 miniatured dachshunds like you who poop and pee all over!!! You need a dog door, do you have one? They are wonderful. My Cav. King Charles Sp. won't go outside when it's wet, she only goes on my porch.

ok, this was funny, but not as funny as your censored one. That was the top funniest post of the year, hands down.


girl meets glamour said...

OMG Jackie! How did I miss this post! We have a mini dachshund too...her name is Dottie. She's was adopted and much like yours love to use our carpet as her litter box and has been a complete pain in the butt to train (thankfully we the carpet is going since hardwood is underneath). So funny, we call her a "kitty-cat dog" cause, well you know. Yes, it seems these very tiny dogs in some way or another end up costing an arm in a leg...not in food but in damage :)


Unknown said...

Oh pets have ruined my wood floors...I hope yours are polyethelined. But believe me I do understand...our little dog Billie owns us.

Anonymous said...

I read this post somewhat after the fact, but I hope you have solved the dilemma by now. Unfortunately, the crate training is the only answer I've found. (and what's WRONG with white carpet? I'd do it again in a heartbeat!) We woosed out too, but then I could not live with the frustration of not getting it, so back into the crate she went. She is now a much better dog for it, and able to hold her business.
LOVE that you called them Rat Bastards! You make me laugh out loud!